… and everywhere really.
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore is not an act, but a habit – Aristotle.
I read an article in Parents Magazine about the “perfect royal children” at the perfect royal wedding. How on earth did they get 10 children under 6 to behave so well. The article postulates – rehearsal.
There’s the rub.
If on the two times a year you go to church (when its most crowded and least graceful) your kids behave poorly…
If when you go to dinner your kids are all over the table, causing a fuss, raising a ruckus and generally making your dining experience miserable…
We are what we repeatedly do.
Repetition builds habits, which in turn drive performance. If you want your kids to behave a certain way, just like riding a bike, they need to be guided towards appropriate behavior with repetitive opportunities and lots of grace (and patience) from their visionary parents.
So, some quick tips on how to build up the habits you want to see in your children, and habits that will serve them well as they mature into adults (the whole goal of this journey of parenting).
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Family Mealtime. Regardless of your schedule, you can find time to share one meal per day with your crew. This should be a sit down experience, with place settings. A modeling of table manners. Correcting (with grace and non judge-mental tone) behavior and etiquette things. If you need a refresher (or first glance) at table etiquette – click here
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Church – this is a moving target for our family. But grace is a big factor as is repetition. We go regularly. I recommend regular church attendance at the same service time for a few reasons. Kids thrive and crave routine. Kids build relationships with the folks that volunteer and serve at that service time (they have schedules too!). I am regularly terrible at things that I do for the first time. By the 10th or 15th time, I have an expectation on where my performance will end up. Same with your kids at church. We brought quiet toys, crayons, books, etc (NO TECH) to help hold their imagination when they were very young.
You too can have “Royally” behaved children. It just takes work.